This Jam Session Called Life


(In memory of my dear friend Ben Oudshoorn 1962-2014)
beach

(I)

As I type,
Trying to capture an old rhythm
That seems forever gone,
With every word,
With every rhyme,
With every sound,
A chaotic universe
Of past and long gone times
Unveils itself…
Before my very eyes…

And then…
I think…
What’s the point
If only silence
Can contain it all…???

Yes… I very well know…
As I type this down…
That if silence should ever reign…
Nothing would be left unsaid again…


sunset

(II)

And with talking eyes
That can never hide
In this timeless now,
Where nothing ever ends
And all is still…
Whatever seems lost,
Whatever seems gone
Is gathered again…
Word by word,
Line by line,
Like a painful birth,
Like a painless death…


Sky

(III)

My dear friend,
No sad notes for you today…
No sad songs…
So let your familiar face
Wear your best smile again…
For tonight…
No new tears will be shed
In this, unrehearsed,
Perpetual one night only show,
Of no second takes…

Tonight, my friend…
We will recall …
Our very own…
Bloemendaal Jazz…
Where all scattered notes
Assembled in line…
And slowly passed by…
In a ritual of self-sacrifice…
In this Jam session called life…


hand
(IV)

And Alone,
I sit here…
And listen
To your Sinatra guy
Sing the songs
you once sung…
While thousand memories return…
Of times when music filled our nights…
And together…
We drank…
The beer,
The wine,
The careless chat,
The joyous laughs…

Remember your detour towards the canal…?
Those Koninginnegedags… ???
Those summer nights…
Of Queimadas and fun???

I do,
I want to remember it all…
Because I also know,
That whatever was…
Will forever last!!!


light

(V)

They say there are billions of us…
Coming and going…
In continuous flux…
And I am glad…
So glad…
Grateful…
So grateful…
For I got to know a guy…
Who danced with the stars…
Who jazzed around…
Wild and untamed
in this circus of ours…
A genuine sprinkler of smiles…
And generous of heart…
Who lived…
As if no more rain
would ever fall again…
As if nothing
would ever come to an end
In this continuous loop of life…

And Just like nothing that was
can ever be erased…
For today bears no editing,
I was his witness
When we saw it all,
When we danced it all,
When we drank it all,
When every inch of time
Was duly gulped down…


water

(VI)

But what a fool I am
To forget what I often say,
That in this eternal day…
In this illusion of time…
Every moment,
Every hug,
Every morning
And night
Every laugh,
Every kiss,
Every goodbye,
It is forever our first…
And last…


flower

(VII)

On your remembrance day,
I looked for your face
Amongst the tearful,
Sorrowful eyes,
As friend by friend
Slowly walked by…
Silently wanting a hug,
A last goodbye …
Not the same they’ve had
Some day…
Not knowing then
That it had been your last…

And when I looked back
To the puzzle pieces I still had,
Not a single trampled flower
Laid over our shared paths,
Only snippets of joy and laughter…
Covered the touching stretch
Of each others spiraling trail…


wine

(VIII)

Later that day,
We poured you a glass
Of Antxon’s Magnum wine
And we talked…
Of better times…
Of your tiki-tikis…
And rubbing of hands
In anticipation of fresh fun…
And we talked…
And we laughed…
And we cried…

And we cried…


zand

(IX)

The world may never know
You passed its mortal way,
But those whose life you touched
Will never forget…
That in their hearts…
A part of you will forever stay…

Gracias amigo
For this jam session of fun
For this fantastic illusion of time!!!


rainbow

(X)

Amigo…

What is this dream
Of an ephemeral existence
That we all so slowly build
And can so suddenly end…?

What is this dream
If not a temporary illusion,
Of which we all come and go
And nothing ever seems to stay?

What is it
If not a never ending jam session
That we must all endlessly perform
And the music seems to go forever on?

Whatever it is,
Amigo…
Whatever it is
This that was…
Now you have moved on …
I thank you with all my heart…

Hombre…
Have a short and safe journey home!!!


light2

(XI)

And now Mr. Sinatra…
Your music may never again sound the same..
And that is ok…
For I am glad…
I am grateful…
That I once knew a guy…
A friend…
Who sung to life…
In his true way…


ben


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